F'rinstance, why the hell is Donald Trump still allowed to pretend he's running for president? Why doesn't he just join the KKK and be done with it? After all, there was an African-American protester attacked by a bunch of the mouth-breathers that enjoy listening to Trump being a racist. Isn't there some kind of law or something about that sort of thing? Mind you, this is the second time this has happened. The last time, there was a Hispanic man smacked around at one of Trump's events. What the actual hell?
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| Similarly, Darth Vader took Han Solo's pizza. In both cases, dick move. |
Umm...That sounds kinda...you know...
You know what? I'm not going to say the word. But, if you know history, you know what that sounds like.
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| And I'll just shut up about it. |
One other thing I wanted to bring up before I get started with the list: Once again, a quick glance at the stats over the last week have shown me that our weirdly specific oddball has been back. Here, see for yourself.
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| And they brought a friend along! |
Seriously, what the hell?!
 |
| Eh...What're ya gonna do, right? |
Anyway, Twitter, as always, was hilarious. So let's look at some of it, shall we? And if you dig it, come on over to the Dark Side and join us!
In no particular order...
My dear children,
If you're reading this, I have died. First, I want you to know that I am sorry for being your only example of how to dance
— ghost mom (@radtoria) November 15, 2015
It’s better to be overdressed than undressed, and that’s why I’m wearing a tuxedo to the DMV.
— Sabrina Dalish Witch (@introvertedwife) November 15, 2015
*Wakes up at 1am*
ME: Not now, Microsoft
MS: Wanna install Windows 10
ME: No not tonight
MS: Cmonn
ME: Stop poking your dick against my back
— Bill Boulden (@Spruke) November 18, 2015
*goes back in time & kills baby Zuckerberg*
*returns to present day*
*flying cars*
*peace on earth*
*president koala*
— Grant Tanaka (@GrantTanaka) November 15, 2015
Syrian Refugees Try to Sneak Into U.S. Disguised as Baked Potatoes pic.twitter.com/QqwMESFh4e
— Shari VanderWerf (@shariv67) November 18, 2015
Every little thing she does is magic
Everything she do just turns me on
Even though I cannot prove it's magic
We should just burn the witch
— rachael (@WookieOnUnicorn) November 21, 2015
Why do the assholes on intervention have so many friends?
— SomeGirl (@Some_girl89) April 18, 2015
David Attenborough comes home from work, puts on his llama pajamas and slips a finger in your butt. He's not crazy. He's David Attenborough.
— Creed (@novicefather) November 21, 2015
Curling irons have a warning label, "For External Use Only." Which one of you sick fucks made that necessary?
— RagingCynic (@FyNghalon) November 20, 2015
Fonts matter pic.twitter.com/SPDN7AaNXL
— Christina (@ChristinaPryor) November 20, 2015
And there you have it!
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| You're welcome. |
Now get out there and have an awesome week! To start it off, being as the holidays are officially starting Thursday, here's a classic Christmas song from far, far away...
Have an awesome Thanksgiving, and take care!
Derek and Bosco
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