Maniac Cop

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A movie so bad, they literally threw out the lead halfway through!

Do not look directly into his mustache...unless you want to fall in love.

This time around, Jake and Derek cracked open 1988's Maniac Cop, which features Robert "The Big Chin" Z'Dar, Bruce "Not as Big a Chin, But Still Pretty Substantial" Campbell, Tom "The Inexplicable Sex Gargoyle" Atkins, Laurene "USA Network Late Night Regular" Landon, Richard "One Bad Mother--...Shut Your Mouth!" Roundtree, William "Have Another Cigarette" Smith, Sheree "Meaner Than She Looks, and She Looks Mean" North and Victoria "Visible Mustache" Catlin.

Lieutenant McCrae (Atkins) searches for a killer who is murdering people while dressed as a cop. When Jack Forrest's (Campbell) wife Ellen (Catlin) is found dead after she catches him in bed with a female cop, Mallory (Landon), Forrest becomes the primary suspect and must find out who the real killer is to clear his name. This leads to a confrontation with the real killer, Matt Cordell (Z'Dar), and his...girlfriend? Keeper? Potential victim? Anyway, her name is Sally, and she beats the piss out of McCrae with a cane, and Matt throws him out a window, leaving the movie rudderless.

When Chins Collide!

Can the suddenly very available Jack and his side piece Mallory find and stop Cordell before he kills again? Will anybody take notice of just how quickly Jack got over the murder of his wife? Did McCrae's mustache survive the fall? Will somebody please give Captain Ripley (Smith) a lozenge?

You'll have to tune in to find out!

Jake picked this one, and almost instantly regretted it. He continued to regret it throughout the entire viewing, and still does. He's terribly sorry. And he can't figure out why everybody things Mallory is so hot. It's kind of weird.

Derek was visibly distracted by Ellen's mustache in every scene she appeared in. He also regrets Jake choosing this movie. There are almost no redeeming qualities to it, and also an unnecessary inserted story line about the mayor, who is covering up what happened to Cordell.

So run--do not walk--as far away from this movie as possible, but listen to our latest episode!

My Name Is Bruce

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Once again, the guys sit down to watch a Bruce Campbell movie. This time, Campbell gets back to his roots and made this one with a bunch of his friends (and some new folks), literally in his own back yard! Sure, the budget was about ten thousand percent higher than the movies he made this way as a kid, but it's a fair trade-off for the improved quality.

A little higher, anyway...

Bruce Campbell takes on his most challenging role as Bruce Campbell, who is recruited--or, to be more accurate, kidnapped--by a superfan named Jeff (Taylor Sharpe) to help rid the small town of Gold Lick, Oregon of Guan-di, the vengeful Chinese god of war and bean curd. Unfortunately, despite years of fighting them on the silver screen and television, Bruce Campbell has no idea how to defeat it.

Will he be able to save the people and town? Will he get the girl (Grace Thorsen), who also happens to be the superfan's mother? Will he fire his agent (Ted Raimi)? And, most importantly, will he bang his birthday hooker? You'll have to tune in to find out!

Good luck with that, Bruce!

Jake enjoyed the scene with the hock shop owner (Tim Quill) and his partner (Danny Hicks) offering Bruce any gun he wants. He was, however, suitably concerned at Jeff's level of obsession with the man. He also thinks that it looks too much like a TV show to be a movie.

Derek didn't have a problem with the look of it, and he really enjoyed the whole cast, including the cameos from past Evil Dead trilogy actors. But he doesn't get the whole thing about the bean curd. He also got a kick out of "Shemp's Premium Whiskey", another nice callback to the Evil Dead films.

So get yourself one big name, keep it under $1.5 million and tune in to this week's episode!