Once again, the guys had to put off Sharknado 5 (Egad...Who knew we would get that far?) because one of them wasn't able to make it to the recording. So, because Larry had to work, Derek and Jake sat down to watch the follow-up to 1988's Young Guns.
|Yoohoo...I'm make you appreciate my brother more...|
A year after the Lincoln County War which led to Billy the Kid and his fellow Regulators becoming wanted men, Billy is still out there running around, being an asshole, and hanging out with Pat Garrett (William Peterson) and "Arkansas" Dave Rudabaugh (Christian Slater), shooting people, and rustling cattle.
He meets with Wallace, who agrees to Billy's terms, and then takes him into protective custody before the trial. District Attorney Rynerson (R.D. Call), however, has a different plan and, being the one who chooses who will testify and who won't, tells Billy he won't be allowed on the bench, and wil therefore be hanged for his crimes.
Naturally upset, Billy escapes and heads back to Fort Sumner.
In New York, former Regulator "Doc" Scurlock (Kiefer Sutherland) is now a teacher who is trying to forget about all the things that happened. Unfortunately, he is not given much time, as a group of sheriff's deputies come and collect him to bring back to Lincoln.
When he gets there, he is thrown into a pit and attacked by a bunch of Murphy men who have also been arrested, only to be saved by his old friend, Jose Chavez y Chavez (Lou Diamond Phillips), who comforts Doc with stories about how quickly he will die when he is hanged, and then the Spirit Horse will come for him. What a pal!
However, before they can be hanged, a lynch mob shows up and takes them, only to reveal themselves as Billy, Pat, Dave, and a few friends. When the real lynch mob shows up, the guys get out of town and head back to the fort so they can gather more men and head down to Mexico on the Mexican Blackbird, a broken trail leading there. Doc doesn't want to go, but Billy--and a number of lynch mob guys who followed them--convince him that maybe he ought to give it a try.
|Dave, for his part, acts like a dildo, thus filling in for the late "Dirtface"|
from the first film.
More bad news comes when Pat announces that he isn't going with them this time, choosing instead to stay at Fort Sumner and open a restaurant. Billy tries to convince him that coming with the gang is the smart thing, but Pat is having no part of it. The gang heads out to see about getting some money for their trip.
They end up on the ranch of John Chisum (James Coburn), John Tunstall's partner before the Lincoln County War. Chisum, not especially happy to see Billy, basically tells them to get bent when he is told by Billy that he owes them $500 for the fighting they did, as well as for not stealing his cattle. When Chisum continues to refuse, Billy says he will kill one of Chisum's men for every five dollars he "owes" them, and then immediately has two of Chisum's men killed.
After the confrontation with Chisum, Billy and his men decide to steal a bunch of Chisum's cattle and sell them, thus gaining the money they felt they were owed.
Meanwhile, Garrett, now an "honest" man, is contacted by Chisum, Wallace and Ryerson, who offer him the position of Lincoln County Sheriff, a $500 reward, and more money when he brings back Billy, dead or alive. Pat buys some new clothes and gathers his posse together, including Poe (Viggo Mortensen) and a writer named Upson (Jack Kehoe), whom Pat has hired to document his search for Billy.
|Poe, like Dave, is also a dildo, but not as fun.|
|Chavez! Chavez, they shot my Fruit Gushers and I bit my lip!|
|Will Brushy Bill ever look and sound like he's not pooping himself when he talks?|