|Dramatic representation of my planned activities.|
So let's get to it, shall we? In no particular order...
You can't tweet a picture of yourself, saying "I'm so ugly!" and get angry when I agree.— Michael Clarke (@Mr_Mike_Clarke) August 31, 2015
Filled with inconsolable rage but when I try to scream out the anger the only sound that comes out is Beaker from the Muppets— Clowndro (@clowndro) September 1, 2015
The only realistic James Bond is an 89 year old man riddled with STDs— Michelle Wolf (@michelleisawolf) September 1, 2015
Now that Avril Lavigne & Chad Kroeger are divorcing who will get custody of the 3 goth teens in Canada?!— Randi Lawson (@RandiLawson) September 3, 2015
Exactly as the Book of Revelation foretold. pic.twitter.com/vUraQwdO6o— Justice Don Willett (@JusticeWillett) September 1, 2015
My boyfriend is going to dress up as Donald Trump 4 Halloween and I'm going as Megyn Kelly and were just gonna to sit at the park & make out— Eve (@lovemydogduck) August 26, 2015
Your dentist masturbates with the same hand that holds your lip out of the way.— david nuzzy nussbaum (@theNuzzy) September 2, 2015
There are 2 types of people : Those who think I'm cute & those who have watched me eat— Claudia (@bossy_bootz) February 16, 2014
My dad said he's leaving everything to me in his Will. Which from the looks of it is extension cords, work socks & hundreds of nuts & bolts— Stefan Urquelle (@OfficeofSteve) September 1, 2015
Hahaha! pic.twitter.com/WHo62j0YLe— Zenneth Nevers (@ZennethNevers) August 31, 2015
And there you have it! As always, if you dig these tweets, go follow these people on Twitter. They write funny stuff all the time.
So, go set fire to some meat and stuff it in your face. Then treat yourself to a bit of something healthier for dessert.
|Maybe some fruit?|
All the best,
Derek and Bosco