Okay...Now that we have that out of the way, I'm going to make this short and sweet.
|Let's get down with our bad selves!|
It started with White House spokestoddler Sean Spicer banning certain news organizations from the White House briefings. It turns out that the ones that were banned were the ones that happened to be reporting on the ties between his boss and Russia, which makes the Angry Orange cranky. And when that happens, everybody suffers.
In December, Spicer said barring media access is what a ‘dictatorship’ does. Today, he barred media access. https://t.co/Ik1szznC70— Washington Post (@washingtonpost) February 24, 2017
Trump 10:32 a.m.: “I love the First Amendment.”— Just Me. (@NoThoughtsHere) February 24, 2017
Trump White House 2 p.m.: Bans NYT, CNN, LATimes, Politico, BuzzFeed from informal briefing
To be honest, nobody's really losing out on not being there. All Spicer does is lie, and with all the leaks coming out of the White House, getting real news isn't all that hard.
|Dramatic re-enactment of the most recent press gaggle.|
Personally, I'd like to see Alec Baldwin show up in full costume.
|Whatever, Ron. Whatever.|
see·ques·chair— Andrew Kirell (@AndrewKirell) February 24, 2017
1. ????? pic.twitter.com/U7LUN4t2TC
|That's what rock and roll music does to you.|
My favorite thing to do at the mall is cropdust Yankee Candle and Bath & Body Works and watch the people's expressions change as they go in.— Derek Springer (@TheRealDCF) February 25, 2017
If the Girl Scouts ever tried to take over the world, I'm pretty sure they could convince me to surrender with just a sleeve of Thin Mints.— Derek Springer (@TheRealDCF) February 24, 2017
Oh, and one last thing about Angry Orange that I almost forgot, which prompted the "getting weird" comment:
GUYS WITCHES ARE CASTING A SPELL TO BIND TRUMP AND CHRISTIANS ARE PRAYING TO PROTECT HIM GET MY POPCORN pic.twitter.com/QRdrISt9Zz— Laura Shortridge (@DiscordianKitty) February 23, 2017
And, of course, there was Twitter! Seriously, were it not for the fine folks there, I might have just lost it by now. Their funny makes my angry go away. So let me share it with you, won't us? In no particular order...
My boss hinted at firing me so I stood in the parking lot yelling random crap. Carl the janitor said he had a fuckdoll of me. Great day.— Eldge (@Sickayduh) February 19, 2017
Remember when musicians were allowed to look like Phil Collins? Dark times, indeed.— Lord Goomba (@ObscureGent) February 19, 2017
According to the bicep of the guy in front of me, he's the "Panty Droppa"— Victoria Sofia (@Ideal_Victoria) February 17, 2017
My shooting star wish finally came true!
*walks into sporting goods store*— Kim Monte (@KimmyMonte) February 20, 2017
Me: can I use ur bathroom?
Worker: sorry the bathroom is for customers only
Me: ok fine I'll take 2 sports
When the Talking Points become self-aware. pic.twitter.com/5NPMioDDfl— Derek M. Young (@DerekMYoung) February 22, 2017
If I ever mutter "yes sir captain tight pants!" During a D&D campaign. Marry me.— Beatriz (@wittwitbarista) January 13, 2017
According to the automatic blood pressure cuff at Walgreens, my wiener has high cholesterol.— Celebrity Gaucho (@CelebrityGaucho) February 25, 2017
"Hand me my gun. The orange one. I've been training for this since I was 7" pic.twitter.com/mUtKquOmm6— Zack (@Mr_Kapowski) February 25, 2017
I just spilled wine on the floor and my dog licked it up and now she's a mom on Twitter with 65k followers.— Amanda B (@amandajpanda) February 26, 2017
And there you have it! Now go have an awesome week. To help you along, here's a little tease of what this week's Here Be Spoilers will be like...
All the best,
Derek and Bosco