Ten Funny Tweets Derek Re-Tweeted Last Week

Well, kids, it's time for another thrilling edition of "Ten Funny Tweets Derek Re-Tweeted Last Week"!

These are ten people on Twitter who are WAY funnier than I am. If you're on Twitter, follow them! If you're not, you should swing on by and check out the variety of weirdness that's available for all to see!

And so...In no particular order:

Pretty busy day thinking about animals wearing wigs.
— AngieDavisheartspeen (@Adar79Angie) March 1, 2014

Porn gives young people an unrealistic and unhealthy idea of how quickly a plumber will come to your house
— UHH (@cervixsmash) January 22, 2013

*taps stranger on the shoulder* 'I don't know what to do with my hands in photos'
— moody monday (@mdob11) March 2, 2014

If you come to my room and find a sock tied to the door...that means I am having sex with the other sock
— Psychotic Humor (@PHDaniel_Street) March 3, 2014

Accidentally fell asleep smoking an e-cigarette and when I woke up my whole house was on the internet.
— Jerm Himselfish (@JermHimselfish) March 4, 2014

Our cover band "They Might Be They Might Be Giants" is not doing well. Raj says our name is misleading because we only do Bob Seger songs.
— s.k.akin (@dadakin) June 29, 2013

We’ve replaced Steve’s regular coffee with a detailed understanding of the impending heat death of the universe. Let’s see if he notices.
— Bucky Isotope (@BuckyIsotope) March 3, 2014

"For the last fucking time, my name is not Greg" --Greg from work
— Santopizza (@santopizza) January 23, 2014

Just farted and it smells like someone getting a perm inside a Taco Bell.
— Ol' Dirty Diaper (@OLDIRTYDIAPER) March 4, 2014

Help, I'm being @ replied to in a bunch a tweets and I don't know why! All I know is that it involves "Text-Based Adventure: the Movie!"
— Caleb Dobbs (@SongforaName) March 7, 2014

Okay...That last one might need a little clarification. Check out this video clip we made a while back. It also features Nigel Springer and Vaughn Springer. (They're my kids!) It should explain things. Or not.


And there you have it! Stay tuned for more good fun!

All the best,
Derek and Bosco