Ten Funny Tweets Derek Re-Tweeted Last Week

Everybody likes funny things! Sure, who doesn't? So why aren't you a part of Twitter yet? There's lots of hilariousness on there, AND YOU'RE MISSING OUT! Join. It's free and relatively painless. Don't make me come over there.

Anyway, it was another hilarious week, and I had to choose carefully, or we'd end up with another list of forty or fifty tweets, and nobody wins when that happens.

So, without further ado, let's see what's funny, shall we?

If you fart at your phone with shazam running, it comes up as Nickleback.

— Miss Amanda (@missamanda) March 26, 2013

I was looking for a used IBM model but accidentally typed "IBS," & was sent to a site for Russian mail order brides w/dietary restrictions.

— Noah Kinsey (@thenoahkinsey) June 22, 2014

A funny thing is an alligator in sunglasses. "Hey- who's that cool alligator?" everyone says. Good luck keeping those glasses on though! Ha!

— Dave Hill (@mrdavehill) June 24, 2014

Still waiting for the “once you go black you never go back” episode of Mythbusters.

— Captain's Log (@howe007) June 25, 2014

What kind of drugs do I want? The kind that made Jethro Tull say,"you know what this song needs? A 15 minute flute solo."

— Mags (@magsaidwhat) February 2, 2013

My wife went to Zumba so I got high and did a drawing of @GuyFieri coming out of a toilet PLEASE SHARE. pic.twitter.com/BK1DiOAicA

— Steve Nobs (@BaronVonSavings) June 5, 2014

“I love to chew but I hate flavor.”--people who put lettuce on sandwiches

— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) June 27, 2014

You know that stuff marathon runners wipe between their inner thighs to prevent chaffing? I put that in my armpits before eating tacos.

— Hazel Goats (@hazelmotes1) June 18, 2014

That's right, mail-delivery guy, drink it all in. The robe, the manly tuft of chest hair, the bra. Enjoy it. Think of it as your tip...

— TO33IE (@thetobbie) June 28, 2014

SEND A CASE IMMEDIATELY "@KSDean: Please tell me @BillCorbett @michaeljnelson and @kwmurphy have seen this. Please" pic.twitter.com/WlPWE4Jm4S

— Kevin Murphy (@kwmurphy) June 28, 2014

And there you have it! Good times!

Now, before I let you go for the week, let me just throw a couple things at your face and see what sticks, okay?

First, as this coming Friday is July 4th, I figure I should probably wish you a happy one now, so as to avoid being all late with it. So, happy 4th. Go blow stuff up...responsibly.

Second, Sausagefest is starting to come together. Still working on acts to be a part of it, so stay tuned for more details. And, if you find yourself in the Port Huron area for Labor Day weekend, let me know so you can come on by and see the show live! A good time will be had by all!

And, finally, I have another video clip for you. And, again, it's from the other podcast you should be listening to, aside from the Ugly Couchcast (and my newest podcast with Larry Sieczynksi and Jake Streeter, Here Be Spoilers), which is Wits. Sure, it's public radio, but this is the good kind. It's funny, and they have fun guests. In fact, here's a clip from a show that included David Cross and Har Mar Superstar:

See? What's not to enjoy? Check out the show. You'll love it.

Enjoy the rest of your week. And have a safe and happy July 4th!

All the best,
Derek and Bosco