...
No.
......
No, not that, either.
...........
You know what? Why don't I just tell you? Otherwise, we'll be here all week, and I've got stuff to do.
It's time for another thrilling episode of Using Stuff That Other People Wrote To Make It Look Like I Did Something! (editor's note: We have GOT to come up with a better title than that.)
I have combed the vast wasteland that is Twitter to bring you five -- maybe even TEN -- minutes' worth of laughs! I do this as a service to you, the reader, as well as the hilarious people I have come across in my daily search for a nice, short giggle. These people crack me up. If they crack you up, too, why not head over there and get a giggle or two?
Anyway, here's this week's list of funny retweets. Stick around after for a brief announcement about this week's Here Be Spoilers episode, as well as another fun video clip! But first, the tweets...In no particular order...
Prison doesn't look so bad. It combines two of my favourite things: getting winked at and trays that keep green beans away from potatoes.
— vladchoc (@vladchoc) November 18, 2014I've been waiting to use this line forever pic.twitter.com/cfsc1X93At
— princess bootyass (@undergroundbby) November 19, 2014My wife told me to give her 12 inches and make it hurt, so we went to Subway™ and I grew slowly emotionally distant over about decade or so.
— Natty Lumpo (@nattylumpo88) November 18, 2014Day 7 trapped in Hot Topic. A week ago 25 Misfits T-shirts fell on me & nobody who has come in the store is strong enough to lift them off
— Ryan (@Karate_Horse) October 17, 2014Here is your national weather forecast until March 21st. pic.twitter.com/i6vaF2Q7ON
— JD (@nevesytrof) November 20, 2014*Tim Burton slams hands on table*
WTF DO U MEAN THERE ARE OTHER ACTORS BESIDES JOHNNY DEPP & MY WIFE
*turns to Depp*
HOW LONG HAVE U KNOWN
— EJ Gomez (@EJGomez) December 7, 2013Every Phil Collins song is about watching someone get murdered, if you think about it. Except Sussudio. No clue what that's about.
— SoulCoffin (@SoulYodeler) November 20, 2014Me: Nice biker jacket. You ride?
Him: No
Me: So you're a liar?
Him:
Me:
Him: Nice yoga pants
Me: That jacket looks so awesome on you!
— Jedi Cheesy Grits (@JediGigi) November 22, 2014i have a small, horrible penis AND i don't even drive a Hummer so i'm confused as heck
— Danny Charnley (@DanKCharnley) November 22, 2014Haha true pic.twitter.com/3ojaVQMnEC
— Grandpa Grim™ (@GrimGrandpa) November 22, 2014And there you have it!
And now, on to other stuff...
First off, thanks to all of you who have been so patient with us at Here Be Spoilers while we've dealt with computer problems, scheduling issues, rains of frogs (and some lovely sponge cake), and what may or may not have been the opening of the Seventh Seal. (Still checking on that last one.)
This next few weeks are going to be like that, too; Larry won't be able to make it for this week's show, and Jake will be going out of town for Thanksgiving, so he won't be here for the show after that.
But this time...this time...we have a plan.
This week, we'll be having our first-ever guest on the show! Her name is Jessica Kinney, and she is a mutual friend of Jake and myself. On top of that, we'll be watching one of my own personal favorite movies of all time: Birdemic: Shock and Terror!
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| THIS IS HAPPENING, PEOPLE! |
And as for the following week, to kick off our month-long Holiday Moviepalooza, we will be joined by my own personal girlfriend, Tonya Mehler. This seemed like a logical choice to me, because she was the guest on The Ugly Couchcast Christmas Eve Self-Pity Extravaganza last year. We're still plotting which movie we'll be watching for that show, so stay tuned!
And on that note, we move along to a nifty little video clip to help get your week started off with a laugh. It's Ali Spagnola again, being funny and awesome with her Hunger Games Franchise Folk Song!
Have a great week, everybody!
All the best,
Derek and Bosco
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