Ten Funny Tweets Derek Re-Tweeted Last Week

Hi, gang!

Well, it's been a helluva week. I hope all of you had a good Thanksgiving. I had to work, but I did get to enjoy a nice dinner with my girlfriend Tonya and her family. We also kicked off Holiday Moviepalooza by watching The Nightmare Before Christmas! But more on that whole thing later.

First, let's take a look at some of the funniest folks on the Twitter machine! And if you dig 'em, by all means, go ahead and get on there and follow them, darn it!

In no particular order...

Remember when mowhawks meant you were a tough punk rocker? Now they just mean that you're 3 and your parents are idiots.

— Bad Mikey (@BadMikeyBad) January 26, 2014

If robots could fart, it would sound like dubstep.

— heffro (@heffroatlarge) October 22, 2013

Dear 13 y/o me, Good news: After you're married, you'll get to fondle big tits any time you want! Bad news: They're yours. You have moobs.

— Heroine Addict (@HeroineAddict) March 8, 2014

I wanna be like one of those manly men in the Viagra commercials who fix custom cars & have cool beards & can probably maintain an erection.

— Brian (@Black__Elvis) November 25, 2014

If you think the children are our future you should know that mine are currently seeing who can make a better ass smudge on the shower door.

— Kalvin (@KalvinMacleod) November 19, 2014

THANKSGIVING TRAVEL JOURNAL: Just witnessed a guy in a "No Fear" t-shirt buy truck stop sushi.

— Woody (@WoodyLuvsCoffee) November 26, 2014

I'm sorry, could you speak up? That's the ear Coolio put the flow in.

— fawn (@ISOremarkable) November 24, 2014

I sent a girl a dick pic. She then decided to send me a picture of her dick. Sexting is hard.

— Squier (@Darchstar007) November 28, 2014

Philly Dog Show Update: Our prized Chupacabradoodle Cerberus has passed away backstage after accidentally eating Fudge, the Chocolate Lab

— wile e. quixote (@ScottLinnen) November 27, 2014

Sometimes I sneak a dollop of my wife's expensive shampoo because maybe a gangsta needs to feel pretty too.

— The Cat Whisperer (@man_spach) November 22, 2014

And there you have it! Pretty groovy, yes?

Now, on to some other important stuff.

Because we're all about class here at The Ugly Couchcast!

Well, kids, it took some time to get it all together, but we've finally put together the Official Here Be Spoilers Holiday Moviepalooza Viewing List with a Very Long Title! Have a look:

(Titles marked with an asterisk will be featured on Here Be Spoilers)

Week 1
The Nightmare Before Christmas
Miracle on 34th Street
Christmas with the Kranks
National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation
Lethal Weapon
A Christmas Story
A Christmas Story 2*

Week 2
Emmet Otter's Jug-Band Christmas
Batman Returns
Bad Santa
Scrooged
Die Hard
Trapped In Paradise
Black Christmas*

Week 3
Santa Claus Conquers The Martians
A Christmas Carol (starring Patrick Stewart)
Gremlins
Rare Exports
A Muppet Christmas Carol
A Christmas Wish
Elves*

Week 4
Jack Frost
Silent Night, Deadly Night
Jingle All the Way
The Littlest Angel
Beyond Tomorrow
Reindeer Games
The Star Wars Holiday Special*

Christmas Day Release:
We will be posting our very own It's A Wonderful Life commentary!

So, if you want to play along at home, get to watchin'! And be sure to download the weekly episodes where we will discuss all the movies!

Also, have an awesome week! And kick it off by watching this clip from the above-mentioned Star Wars Holiday Special! It has Bea Arthur in it!

Hey, it could have been worse...It could have been the first thirty minutes, which features almost no human dialog at all! Have a great week!

All the best,
Derek and Bosco