June 20, 2016

Ten Funny Tweets Derek Re-Tweeted Last Week

Dear 2016,

Look...We've tried being reasonable with you. We've given you one opportunity after another to show that you are capable of not completely sucking out loud. We've even joked about you, saying things like, "Well, maybe if we get it out of the way early, the rest of the year will be easy!"

And now, here it is, almost six months later, and you're still being a complete and utter asshole. SO not cool. Seriously...Knock it off. I'm getting tired of trying to be funny when I am surrounded by sadness and grief because it's hard enough under normal circumstances, and also because it feels weird and uncomfortable making jokes during those situations.

So, as I said, please cut it out. I've had enough.

Thanks,
Derek

*****

(And now, back to our regularly-scheduled ramblings...with this week's GIFs provided by our pal @redtache, who is funny, so you should follow him.)

*****

Okay...Hi, everybody! I hope you're all well. I also hope you've been paying attention to the news because it seems that, once again, Donald Trump has been working very, very hard to destroy any and all hope he might have of becoming the president. And it has been hilarious.

And it gets better! His campaign sent out an e-mail Saturday in the hope of getting $100,000 in "emergency cash" to try facing off against Hillary Clinton's $8 million ad buy in potential swing states. Go ahead and do that math in your head. I'll wait.

Of course, for about a year now, Trump has been insisting that he didn't need to spend a bunch of money on ads because he gets free time on TV whenever some news program wants to hear him muttering his ridiculous neural firings.

What is happening in Donald Trump's brain at any given moment.
Meanwhile, Clinton, as I said, is well ahead of the game, making sure she's got all of her ducks in a row, and she has a strong team behind her, getting things done.

Oh, and speaking of firings, Trump also fired his campaign manager, Cory Lewandowski, today, so...yeah...

But, really, the comparison is pretty easy to make. And here's a fine example:


Needless to say, as Trump's polls tank hard, he's scrambling to try to put together a campaign that, really, he should have had ready well before now. On top of that, his own part (the GOP, for those of you living under a rock) is working on possible ways to dump him from the nomination at the convention.


It's not looking good for him.

There's a metaphor in here somewhere...
In other stupidity, the Republicans in congress continue to claim that regulating assault weapons, even for people on the no-fly and terrorist watch lists, is unconstitutional, despite their regular use to kill people for no other reason than to show what a colossal dick a person can be. They claim that banning assault weapons, like Bill Clinton did during his time in the White House, will not stop this sort of thing from happening. Some have pointed out that there is factual evidence that proves otherwise.


Er...

Distraction initiated...Hey, guys! Tomorrow's Taco Tuesday!
And then there were tweets. So many good tweets. And I had to pick a small portion of them to share with you, kind reader, and perhaps convince you to come visit us over in the Twittersphere to maybe get a giggle or provide one. Now here we are...


And there you have it! Now get out there and have an awesome week. Also, be sure to throw out a "HUZZAH!" to our pal Billy Brooks, VFX ninja and executive producer-kind-of-guy, for the show he works on, Con Man, being up for an Emmy! And wish 'em all luck on that!

Oh, and go look at this.


We are outta here! Keep on truckin'!

Or, you know, the equivalent in your galactic region, I guess...
All the best,
Derek and Bosco