July 25, 2016

Ten Funny Tweets Derek Re-Tweeted Last Week (RNC Edition!)

Okay, guys, here's the deal:

I planned on posting my usual ten tweets this week. In fact, I still have the list of them that I pulled. But then, when I was going through all of the re-tweets on my page, I noticed quite a few that were directly related to the Republican National Convention (aka Fear-A-Palooza featuring an angry carrot), and realized I had a ton of those, too.

So, it seemed like a reasonable idea to post a bunch of those. However, I didn't want to just throw out the other ones. That's why I've decided to make this a two-part list. First, I will put up the regular tweets, because I figured that anyone who would be offended by the potentially mean things said about the RNC would still want to see the other stuff. Then I'll put the RNC-specific list.

However, since you all should know by now where I stand concerning Trump, I don't imagine any of you will be surprised that I'll be using a number of images related to his disturbing interest in his daughter when I talk about other stuff beforehand.

Yeah, he totally wants to bang her...If he hasn't already.
First off, I want to talk about Ghostbusters. Specifically, I want to talk about one of its cast, Leslie Jones. A certain festering dickbag writer for Breitbart, whose name I will not give here because he doesn't deserve any more publicity, decided that he wanted to sic his "fans" on her, sending her racial slurs and insults, until she quit Twitter.

Seriously? How fucking sad does your life have to be that the only joy you get in life is to make someone guilty of nothing more than being a funny and talented comedienne quit social media, where she enjoyed stating in contact with her fans?

The upside of this story is, the Breitbart writer has been banned for life from Twitter. (And good riddance.) Also, Leslie Jones is back on! Follow her (@Lesdoggg) and show her some support!

By dating, he means "having sex with"...
Among other political stuff, there was a little announcement concerning Hillary Clinton's choice for her running mate, Virginia senator Tim Kaine. Aside from the fact that he doesn't seem particularly exciting to me, the announcement was met with mild, if somewhat indifferent, approval from most sources. There were, as there always will be for this sort of thing, complainers, but what're ya gonna do? You can't please everybody.

One other thing about la familia de Drumpf (aside from his overwhelming need to let the world know that he would totally bang his daughter, if only she wasn't his, you know, daughter) at the convention: Melania, Trump's wife, who gave an impassioned speech about what she feels America needs, er, appears to have plagiarized a good portion of it from a speech that Michelle Obama gave at the 2008 Democratic Convention. Whoops.

Several stories were put forward, from "she did not steal the speech and wrote it herself" to "someone on her speech writing team put those bits from Michelle Obama's speech because Melania admires her." (Notice the vast difference just between those two comments.) There was also a member of Trump's organization--not his campaign--who came forward and claimed (on Trump Company letterhead) to have been the one who wrote the speech. The bottom line is, whomever is responsible for the passages that were obviously lifted from the first lady's speech, nobody will ever find out for sure.

...Because then everyone will know I want to bang her.
Aaaaanyway, let's look at the first list of tweets from the Twitter place that the kids seem to be talking about so much these days. In no particular order...

Excellent work, everyone.

That's a bad touch, Donald.
Now, there's one other little difference in the RNC-specific list; I didn't put a limit on the number of re-tweets a post got. (As you may have noticed, I usually try to keep it to ones with fewer than 1000 because those ones have already had a bunch of attention.) So...let's get this dog-and-pony show underway! In exactly the order they were posted (just to maintain a timeline of the whole shitshow)...

And there you have it! Pretty groovy, no? Now, having been fully sated by a plethora of tweets, why not get out there and have a super-awesome week, will ya? And rest assured, there will be a DNC list next week, because judging from just what I've seen so far today, there's going to be a lot to choose from.

Nothing more to add, really.
Now get outta here, you knuckleheads. But before you do, check out Jon Stewart taking over the desk briefly from Stephen Colbert this last week...

Welcome back, Jon!

All the best,
Derek and Bosco