This week, the guys sat down to watch an MST3K classic: The Brain That Wouldn't Die, featuring Jan in the pan!
|Stop it! It wasn't funny the first time!|
Having brought someone back from the other side, Bill proceeds to dry hump his fiancee in front of his father, who complains that it won't be fun to watch anymore once Bill and Jan (Virginia Leath) are finally married.
|Until then, though...Boy howdy!|
Unfortunately, Bill is almost as bad at driving as he is at not being a total dick to his dad, and he crashes the car, getting thrown from it himself, and decapitating Jan.
Undeterred, Bill collects Jan's head and jogs to the country place, where Kurt, who has a funky hand that looks like it is made of a monkey paw coated with gravy skin, tries to warn Bill about the thing in the closet, but Bill is too distracted due to Jan's head being not connected to a body, but instead is wrapped in his best sports coat. A temporary fix is quickly assembled.
|But she's not about to stay quiet about it, so...|
His first stop, naturally, is a bar where what we think are supposed to be exotic dancers stroll around with a bored look on their faces, shimmying with the minimal amount of effort, in an attempt to maybe get a few drinks out of someone.
|Oh, my poor fiancee! Oh, woe is m--Saaaaay...|
|HEY, YOU GUYS!|
While Bill is trying to convince a woman he went to school with that he can fix the scars that left her relying on the kindness (and money) of strange, creepy dudes with cameras, Jan convinces the thing in the closet to attack Kurt at feeding time, and it goes off surprisingly well, with the monster ripping off Kurt's good arm.
|Really?! Are you shitting me?!|
The monster attacks, Jan laughs, everything burns, and the viewer is left unsatisfied.
Larry loves this flick, even going so far as to admit that it's in his regular rotation. Weirdo. But he is willing to admit that the quality of acting could have been better.
Jake thinks it's funny, but not worth watching more than once, unless it's without the MST3K riff, in which case even once is too many. He's also concerned about potential weird sex stuff happening to Jan's severed head.
Derek is not at all happy with this movie, and he says so. He also thinks that all the characters are awful people. And he wonders about whether Jan's attitude would change after having a new body. Oh, and he manages to hypnotize both Larry and Jake by making them look at this:
|LOOK AT IT!|
So pour yourself a nice casserole pan of neck juice and tune in to this week's episode!